28 February 2007

Sense of Adventure

My family going back through history has been well known for exploring the world, My grandfather for instance was walking over europe during the start of a world war, he was in poland when the news broke, wrong time wrong place!

And now I fully understand what made him leave britain, with hardly any cash and a lot of determination, to travel the world, see new countries and experience new cultures.

The drabness of daily office work is something that I feel will destroy me, nothing challenges me, nothing grows, there is nothing NEW. All over the world things are happening, countries are rising and falling, economies are fluctuating, people are risking their lives in battle, and their bank accounts starting new companies. The ravages of time are flying by daily, it seems like no time has gone since I first started work, every day the same.

I need to travel, need to try smoething new, I want to a Job that I Want to do, not Have to do.

Of course its a fantasy, christmas drained my money, il be saving upto june jsut to be able to afford festival season then I will be broke till christmas again. All the jobs in city centres are office jobs, same shit, different office. I have joined the ranks of the broken millions, floating mindlessly through the working day, praying my lottery ticket pays off.

27 February 2007

Aerosmith + London Hydes Park = PISSSUPPPP

It seems like in the summer of 2007 I will be going down to see the one and only Aerosmith, yes thats right AEROSMITH with the amazing, if slightly geriatric, Steve Tyler.

The gig will be starting quite early but we could do with a pub nearby to Hyde park for a couple of beverages, any ideas?

23 February 2007

Drunken Debauchery?

Tonight is going to be my first big night out in a while, after last weeks 2 pints that made me feel a little drunk I am well aware how my alcohol tolerance may have slipped to a ludicrously low amount. Cheap night?

I hope so.

Tonight a guy from work is leaving the company for pastures new, so it is our duty as his fellow co-workers to send him off in style, by getting as wasted as humanly possible and staggering to our homes no earlier than closnig time.

A friend of mine, il call him 'Mr Ballache' for now has also tried pushing an idea on a few of us that we should ahve a full fancy dress night out round town. This is not in itself a bad idea, fancy dress instantly makes women see you as a fun loving care free kind of guy, and greatly increases your chance of getting laid, not however if you go as a womble.

Yes that right.

Mr Ballache has on order 8 womble costumes for a nights hire, of which he wants the money off us without even asking us in the first place.

I would gladly dress up as many things, a devil? hell yeah! a cowboy Yee Haa! a priest or doctor? Definately! although last time i was a priest a nun stole my underwear.

But a womble?!?

21 February 2007


Liars really piss me off.

You get all kinds, inthe office it is a barrage of constant lies and hidding information, outside the office i have heard everything from "This scar was from a bullet yeah, i was ina holdup" while the suferee points to something that looks suspiciously like a fag burn, all the way to yeah my dad paints the silver strip on the back of mobile top up cards, he lets me do a few so I always write the numbers down".

Both complete bullshit but there you go. Lies have become part fo our everyday life, sometimes covered as 'discretions' sometimes just complete twats spouting off. Whats the worst lie youve ever heard?

20 February 2007


Since it seems that the Americans do not recognise the term Chav I guess I have a bit of explaining to do. Despite my dislike of the American traitorous hangdogs and their silverspoon polititions (You know you want to be British really) , it is merely a vague dislike, its hard not to dislike a country who votes the warmongering Bush family in repeatedly. Clinton was ok, so he had an affair, atleast he didnt destroy your economy then declare war on any country that negatively affects the USA. Dont worry Jezebel that doesnt include you, I want to have babies with your sexy self.

But back to the point which I am oh so good at drifting from. Rather trying to describe this myself I suggest going on http://www.chavscum.co.uk/ an looking at 'how to spot a chav'.

This will allow any travelling USAeons to comment on how they wore the same clothes as a nearby chave (Wether you did or not) 30 years ago, then burst out laughing.

19 February 2007

Annoy a Chav Week

Chavs, Townies, Scum or simply those young kids who wear Burberry a lot thinking its cool and not realising it is in fact golfer gear. Yes the uncivilized foul mouthed scum who ask for small change, cigs and after a few pints a fight.

These Chavs are becoming more and more of a problem in the UK, and now my friends I think its time to put a stop to it.

From the 26th of February till the 4th of March I believe we should have Annoy a Chav week, everyone get together and slander, ridicule and deny chavs their rights. You could do as little as sit behind a chav on a bus and say how your dads realy pleased with his new burberry top you got him for his 65th birthday, or simply burst out into tears of laughter when you pass a Chav in top to toe nike tracksuit.

So whos with me? Lets destroy the Chav culture!

14 February 2007

I thought I had best apologise for not blogging a huge amount over the past few weeks, partly due to not really getting upto much, partly due to being very busy at work.

Well, today is valentines day!

Thats right the worlds most depressing day for single postmen nationwide is upon us, and I have not got a girl with which to share it in the new city I inhabit. This is not quite as depressing as it would normally be for a single bloke such as myself, im a bit skint at the moment, women are expensive, notoriously so on the 14th of the second month. I also have to admit that the freedom of the single life is something I would miss, my previous relationship being a little too constrictive for my liking.

Its not all bad, I have received a Valentines text off a cute girl from leicester, someone who was it not for distance I would have asked out a long time ago. I then got one off a girl in leeds, much closer to home and who recently grew out of chavdom and into what is generaly know an as 'gorgeous'

The big question is, do I go out tonight, do I goto Leeds or do I stay in, mope a little and have a big pizza to round the evening off.

Anyone out there want to be my valentine?