27 May 2008

A Quick Rebrief

I posted something last night that I had to remove over a slight worry that the person it was aimed at may know about this blog.

Needless to say one of the points was on my marital status. I am 100% single again, the girl who I got back with is a great girl, but there is simply no spark there.

In other news I stubbed my toe last night on my weights, it didnt stop bleeding for three hours and now im limping like a crack addict.

23 May 2008

Football, Fags and Fights

Pretty much covers the last week, A couple of smokes covered a particularly stressful period that covered a Leeds game and Brokering a deal which has given me £120 a year for a minimum of 5 years (2 hours negotiation, 5 minutes of work required)

The football was a bloody nail biter, a last minute goal saved us from probable failure, and Leeds fate will be decided this sunday.

I also felt for the Chelsea fans as John Terry made a fatal slip, leaving Man U free to win the Champions League Final on Sudden Death Penalties.

Later on that night I got jumped by a 50 year old geezer, fortunately I held him off without punches, had to do this because
A) It's a bar where I occasionally work, so I can't really go around twatting people
b) Because I have just got off crutches and really don't want to get in a fully fledged fight while my legs have only just got used to supporting me
c) I would have felt quite guilt punching a bloke as old as him, seriously it would be like beating up my dad.

There was also a vague d) I was so drunk I could hardly see straight confusing my decision making abilities.

This did quite worry me though. Not that long ago I would have knocked him to the ground without a thought, have I picked up morales from living in York, a fairly quite city. Or was it because I really am that unsure about my ability to stand up on my still weak legs.

Either way I might have to increase my gym visits to get some lower body strength back, holding off the more seasoned man was not exactly a difficult feat, but if I got into more serious trouble I would be in even more serious trouble if I found myself holding back my punches.

I am currently seeing this girl I met in a bar a while back, she iscute, I like who she is, but it just doesn't feel right.

Jesus Christ I'm becoming a metrosexual... If you need further proof look at how I just swore with 'Jesus Christ' rather than 'Fuckin 'ell'.

18 May 2008

Sunday Blues

I think on some occasions Sundays are even worse than Mondays.

If you cant find anything to do you sit there, bored, and becoming increasingly aware that tomorrow you will be working and that you should possibly be doing something.

I don't think there is anything on gods green earth as mind numbingly boring as Sunday afternoons with the possible exception of Big Brother, Which is a lot of people who have personality disorders set in the location of a perpetual Sunday afternoon.

Big Brother is not only as heavily boring as a Sunday afternoon but also intensely annoying, rather like incredibly bad tooth ache.

In other news me and the Girlfriend are officially back together, though I'm not sure how long for. She is really nice and I do like her but sometimes it just doesn't feel like a relationship. No it is not Aussie girl by the way, that is long dead and buried.

However, I was thinking of getting an electricians/Carpenters qualification, doing a few years work over here and emigrating to New Zealand or Australia. I do think that it might just be a bad idea though as my natural 'couldn't give a shit' attitude may just win me the Darwin award as I step onto a poisonous shell like creature, jump backwards into a poisonous spiders web, flail around and get my leg bitten off by a crocodile (Ironically saving me from the poison) before falling into a watering hole and being savaged by a duck billed platypus.

Maybe I'll just move to Melbourne, the worst that could happen tome there is getting run over by Harold Bishop.

Anyhow, back to procrastinating.

14 May 2008


So after a lot of drinks at a double birthday for some bouncers (Twins) I got back with an ex.

Yes I know that is complete betrayal of my self esteem.

Yes I know it will probably end badly.

But on the plus hand she has an amazingly cute smile.

The downside is that prior to this i went through a state of bacholourism. This means that my room is littered with empty polistyrene containers, pizza boxes and the like, not to mention clothes scattered here there and everywhere.

So at somepoint, with sex being on the upcoming agenda, I need to tidy things up. This in itself is a feat measurable to that of reaching peace in Iraq, and has the opportunity fror more casualties.

Needless to say I need to get this cleared up asap.

But I. just. cant. be. arsed.

13 May 2008

Downloading Movies

I am not particularly criminal like but a few years back I may have downloaded the odd film from the internet ‘sans’ payment. After all they were easily accessible, fast and free to get!

Unfortunately now days things have changed, the film companies are cracking down and all my old methods of downloading have become unreliable, slow and virus ridden. Any attempt usually leaves you with either the wrong film or a horrendously poor quality film.

I spent a fair few hours looking around last night and was surprised to find that there are now several cheap legal and quick services to download full DVD Movies available, hell I just got Batman Begins, a film I always wanted to see for $1.99 that’s around a £1 to us Brits!

The best one I found was http://www.myvideolib.com/ This site is bloody brilliant, I am downloading full length DivX Movies like Superbad at the moment which cost me a mere $2.99, not bad for one of the funniest movies I saw last year!

It’s nice to see that the film companies have finally cottoned on that by releasing films at a much lower cost they can actually sell a LOT more of them!

The fact of the matter is I don’t mind paying a couple of quid for a film, paying £20 ($40) is what I object to! Fortunately there are some good sites to legally download full length movies which are a godsend, cheap good quality films at a price that doesn’t leave my wallet empty!


I went to sit by the river for my dinner today, the benches were full of old ladies and tourists, those that didn't have a bench hovered expectantly around one until it became available.

So governed by the laws of laziness I opted out of mad dashes for bench space and sat on the riverbank, a cobbled edge sloping down to a lower platform that runs by the river.

The sun was shining, the ladies walking by were particularly fine and I munched away feeling good about the world.

It was only when I got back to my desk at work when I noticed the unmistakable smell of river. Its not a horrendous smell. Its not a pleasant smell, its not even a powerful smell. It is just that smell that seems to pervade everywhere around you, giving the area around you that slight classic leaf mould smell that has never successfully sold as a fragrance for a reason.

Needless to say it seems that one of the rivers more recent floods must have coated the bank with a good ol' layer of river dirt that seeped into my trousers.

Bloody Brilliant...

07 May 2008

Let the Sun Shine!

It seems like summer has finally arrived I thought.

As I donned my short sleeved shirt and went to eat my lunch down by the river, letting the sun radiate over my body and the breeze cool my skin.

Yet it was not the sun nor the shirt that signified the start of summer. It was the women.

Despite all probability there seems to be a type of woman who only appears during summer. When the weather is poor I think they migrate to warmer climates on tehir Daddy's credit card, however when the weather in good ol' Britain is good tehy come out in droves.

If you do not know what I am talking about you are either female or a gay.

As I sat by the river I saw stunner after stunner walk by my bench. All of them significantly out of my league and most definately out of my price range.

This revelatino came after a weekend of relaxation, I did nothing. For several MOnths now I have been working incredibly hard and so far it has netted me a regular £2 a day. Doesn't seem like much but it equals a pint a day for the rest of my life pretty much!

So three days of chilling out in the sunshine, playing on the PS2 for the first time in ages, or just watching a few films (Back to the future, I forgot how good the first and third film was, the second may only seem so shite because from the perspective of when the film was made this is the future!)

To be honest I needed the break and it put things back into perspective. I am working at getting my life in order so I dont have to work, or at least dont have to work for 11 months of the year.

I have started looking at my trip around Europe this year, mid summer this time around so it will be HOT, but the snu is calling, the beaches are bein washed by a heated sea and my mind is drifting to the adventures of last year.

I wil update soon on the plan!

02 May 2008

Bank Holiday!!!!

Wohooo, its that time again, three days of pure weekend, the weather is good and my mates are playing a gig, so sun music and secx is on the cards, well, maybe not the sex, been dry now for nearly two weeks :(

My lucky bastard of a flat mate met this canadian bird while he was over for a stag do where he discovered his exebitionist side by having a bit of the ol ruff an' tumble in the dorm, then the guy who has the fortuitous luck to do very little work for mucho money has gone off to see her again and they have been sexing along France, Switzeralnd and Munich.

Again - Lucky Bastard.

Ahh well for now I shall situate myself in a beer garden somewhere and get some good ol' relaxation going!